The stressless alphabet.

I have got to get better at this whole post on ze blog thing. I always feel like there is NOTHING to say. I lead a very dull life, couldn't ja tell? However, this upcoming week is going to be my hell week. What is hell week, you ask? Oh, just sit back, relax, and, oh wait, no. Don't relax, that defeats the purpose of hell week.

You see, hell week is very appropriately abbreviated as HW. You know what else is abbreviated as HW? Homework.  Hell week, however, far surpasses homework in that it consists of homework, projects, test, and somehow, major life events. No one knows how that last one always seems to work its way in, but trust me, if you have a hell week and something DOESN'T go wrong in your personal life, it isn't a hell week.

Now, all this adds up to one very delightful thing for you to go through, stress.

Now that we have the definition out of the way,  let's talk about ways to deal with this stress. I have developed a system. The way it works is that you start at A and work your way to Z. Here is the list for you:

A) Have some coffee. As I have said before, coffee fixes all things. Unless you are out of coffee, which is just terrifying.

B) Take a nap.

C) Go for a walk.

D) Eat some chocolate.

E) Buy a new pair of shoes.

F) Refuse to be stressed.

G) Get a puppy.

H) Not a dog person? Get a cat.

I) Not a cat person? Get a fish.

J) Not a fish person? Make some sushi.

K) Clean the dirtiest room in your house.

L) Yell at your pillow.

M) Punch your pillow.

N) For you married folks...maybe go into your rooms for a little bit and just, um, relax. ;)

O) For you folk over 21, participate in taking some liquid courage.

P) Take a bubble bath.

Q)  Take a bubble bath with a rubber ducky, some candles, and wine.

R) Not a bath person? Take a shower.

S) Watch an entire season of the Gilmore Girls.

T) If you are a dude: Watch all the Die Hard movies.

U) Write about it? You hate someone? Something? Get a red pen and just have at it.

V) Listen to classical music.

W) You hate classical music? What is wrong with you? Listen to it anyway, educate yourself.

X) Go on a Facebook friend deleting splurge.

Y) Revisit your inner child and watch your favorite Disney movie.

Z) You have reached the end of the alphabet and you are still stressed? Time to get crazy, you need to go out, buy a gremlin, and feed it after midnight. That will put everything into perspective.

So, here is to a happy hell week for everyone! I hope you aren't too stressed.

I declare today...

TICKLED TUESDAY!


Okay, okay, I know. It is Wednesday! But I started this yesterday and wanted to post it and, let's be honest, I don't have the patience to wait a week. So here you go, Wednesday's post is Tuesday's. Make of that what you will. 


That's right my enthralled followers! I have decided to dedicate Tuesday to things that tickle me pink, tickle my fancy, tickle my interest, in essence, things that tickle. So, for your stalking enjoyment, I present to you a list of things that make me happy!


 I encourage everyone to post what makes them happy in the comments. This is an attempted to turn the Monday frown upside down by making you think of all the little happy things in your life. :)

1) Fancy pens. There is just something AWESOME about going to sign your name and pulling out an epic pen that makes you look like a boss.

2) Retro inspired music! Let's be honest, you can only listen to rap and techno so many times, but retro is forever. So, take a listen to this, it will make your day I PROMISE. 

3) Coffee! Speaks for itself folks. Delightful and creamy, this morning treat will forever be in my heart! To that end, I present you with a poem about the bean and its ultimate end. 

Ode To Le Coffee

Dear Coffee Bean

You are to me

A good ol' Bean

You make me wake

By making me shake

And making my heart quake

You give my brain a rush

As you stimulate my brain synapses

With your liquid love you push

My arse out the bed and my head out the clouds. 

Thank you Coffee! 

From Bean to Breakfast 

Just for me

More cream if you please. 

4) '90s Cartoons. Anime has ruined morning cartoons. My favorite was probably those pesky kids and their dog. 

5) Anatomy. Apparently, this makes me freaky. I am ok with that. Let's be honest, if you aren't at least a little fascinated by some aspect of the human body, you probably have some sort of chemical imbalance going on in your brain. Which, if I might add, is also fascinating but a whole other kettle o' fish.

<-- A picture I found that I think very accurately describes a kettle of fish. Enjoy. 










Anyway, that is the end of today's thoughts on what makes me happy. Join me next Tuesday as we review the joys of what makes me happy again. I will come up with five new things. I have also decided that, if enough readers actually care, I will pick three of the readers favorite things and comment on those. No pressure. 


Your singing telegram 
~*~ The Singing Telegram Girl